An Uneducated Daughter-in-Law

We may pretend to be much moderate and liberal in thinking but even till today the fact remains that many people look down upon women and they are not ready to accept women at higher positions in the corporate world and at par with them at home.

Being from a middle working class family, there has always been an emphasis on getting the quality education and being independent in life. Yesterday, while I was waiting for my friend at a coffee shop, I happen to hear a glimpse of what the two seemingly cultured ladies sitting next to my table were discussing. They appeared to be hailing from well-off families.

Surprisingly, their conversation left me stunned and shocked. “Na-na, ye ladki nahi jamegi, hume padhi likhi bahu nahi chahiye” (This girl won’t suit our requirement, we do not want an educated daughter in law) - said one of the lady.

“Did I hear it correctly?” was the first thought that came to my mind. But it made me more curious to listen to their conversation with a little more attention. From their dialogue it appeared as if the other lady had suggested a match for this lady’s son whom she apparently didn’t liked just for the reason that the girl was educated. “Humko to aisi bahu chahiye jo hamare hissab se chale…apna dimaag na lagaye. Ghar par reh kar hum sabki sewa kare, ghar ke saare kaam kare aur uff tak na kare” (we need a daughter in law who will live as per our conditions without applying much of her own brain, take care of us and the family without any distress)

This lady then precisely told that she wanted a very homely and not much educated girl for her son and soon they left the coffee shop.

By then, my friend had also come and we got engrossed in our own discussions…

Though the evening went well but I was not able to drift myself away from what I heard at the coffee shop. I was preoccupied with those thoughts and kept wondering, what could have made that lady say so?

Was she herself also uneducated? Is that why she wanted a less educated Daughter-in-law? Though she didn’t looked like uneducated!

If yes, didn’t she ever felt the importance of a well-educated lady in bringing up the family and kids?

Did she actually wanted a daughter in law for herself and an understanding wife for her son or was she just looking for a full-time unpaid maid for herself and her family?

Was she afraid that an educated daughter in law will try to find logic & reasoning in everything that she is asked to do?

Was she afraid that an educated daughter in law will take over her position at home?

Reasons could be many…but the essence is that people are not ready to accept a woman who is qualified enough to handle all her responsibilities with better efficiency. They still look at women as someone they can control and govern. And this becomes all the more surprising when comes from another woman.

Where is the society heading? Are we really following the path that will take us to a developed society, developed nation, a better world to live in?